| memories of my existence..
I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give
I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love
Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby
I gave you all the love I got
I gave you more than I could give
I gave you love
I gave you all that I have inside
And you took my love
You took my love
I keep crying
I keep trying for you
There's nothing like you and I baby
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
When you came my way
You brightened every day
With your sweet smile
Didn't I tell you
What I believe
Did somebody say that
A love like that won't last
Didn't I give you
All that I've got to give baby
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
I keep crying
I keep trying for you
There's nothing like you and I baby
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
This is no ordinary love
No ordinary Love
Keep trying for you
Keep crying for you
Keep flying for you
Keep flying I'm falling
I'm falling
Keep trying for you
Keep crying for you
Keep flying for you
Keep flying for you I'm falling
I'm falling
|
8.30.2003
hihihi... i love today... today was my third long exam in math 17.. amazing because after the test.. it didn't weigh me down.. meaning i'm sure i'm going to pass... and thats something big for me.. since the average of my grades is 3.. thats like 60%.. the exact passing line.. its dangerous for me because if i get even just 0.1 lower than that.. depends if the teacher doesn't give considerations, i fail.. ehehe.. its not that i'm bad at math.. i was pretty good at it in highschool.. its just that i'm careless.. the usual yet fatal excuse.. i forget signs.. i forget to rewrite a variable.. i copy the wrong variable.. but the process and idea of solving it is just right.. ha! stupid fuddle-sticks.. ehehe
maybe watching finding nemo last night with sweetie.. or for a bigger picture.. spending the rest of the afternoon with sweetie for our 8th monthsary celebration, instead of studying for my test.. was what i needed.. no stress the day previous the test.. to relax my brain? yeah.. i guess i'll be doing that from now on.. and start studying bit by bit through the whole week... like i did.. or maybe just the rewrite my whole notebook part..
it was amazing today because i knew i didn't know all those crappy trigonometry identities and reduction formulas well.. it was merely.. i have a feeling it goes like this-- type sense.. neither did i practice continuously solving everything in sight which i knew my brainiac classmates did.. or cram during the last 1 and a half hours previous the test.. well.. i helped explain a few items.. but it doesn't count as cramming...
hay..
anyway.. a lot has obviously happened during my 9 day break from the blog.. ehehe.. theres the special sweetie sunday.. the stupid Alternative Classroom Learning Experience experience of mine.. where i was somewhat harrassed.. well.. i'm tired of the details.. eheheh.. i was just writing everything a while ago in one of my yahoo groups.. then it didn't post.. maybe i'm not registered c/o their stupid upgrading..
then my special finding nemo outing with sweetie!!! hihih.. now thats what i call relaxing..
haay..
i'm tired..
weird.. just a few minutes ago.. i was packed with energy.. oh well...
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/30/2003 10:59:00 PM
8.21.2003
i'm missing my sweetie all over again... i don't know..
even though we were together yesterday.. its just not enough..
its just that everything seems so right when i'm with him.. nothing fails, nothing bad happens, i always feel safe with him, and everything is free from malice...
everything has a way...
right now, i bet he's asleep... well, that's what i think..
he told me he was tired and said he would be sleeping early tonight...
i miss him..
i miss the times i'd catch him on the net doing stuff
those were the times when he was naturally full of energy and it was hard to predict what he was up to because of the many possibilities...
now, he's usually exhausted because of either school work or "house work"..
still he finds time to talk to me though evidently tired..
he tells me its his only real rest.. escape from more chores as i interpret it..
he's the only one people can rely on from what i see and hear..
i miss his makulit text messages..
now, he doesn't usually have enough to buy credit (neither do i Ü)
and when he does get credit, he uses it all up to call me on nights he couldn't call the house because of a job in the far regions of manila..
i miss his arms around me, the feeling of warmth and comfort snuggling..
he's not like the other guys out there who are shy to even touch their love.. or worse, overly touch their object of affection..
man, i just miss him.. wish he was here...
*wish you were here.. i.. wish you were.. here..*
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/21/2003 08:36:00 PM
eheheh.. its amazing how much cramming does for me.. i wasn't able to access my blog for quite some time which was so untimely since i needed so called diary entries for my english project.. well.. maybe i'll not post whatever i made here since the diskette where i saved it has a virus i think...
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/21/2003 07:02:00 PM
8.19.2003
eheheh.. its freezing here! and I really mean freezing.. well, maybe it because i'm still in my spaghetti straps since yesterday..
well, its Quezon City day, so supposedly, I don't have school! yay!... for those who don't have to practice at school, type handouts and make props today.. ehehe.. well, my consolation was that i got to wake up late.. and snuggle in my stuffed toy and pillow collection.. trying to hide from the creeping cold..
anyway.. how long has it been?
hmm..
okay.. since before going to mami's luncheon..
hmm..
so i arrived in galleria at around quarter to 12, my mom took me.. then.. we went to the super market where there were immensely a lot of patikims.. well, lets say more than i'm usually accustomed to at regular supermarkets.. there was this swiss miss hot rich chocolate booth, this crumpy chocolate spread booth, argentina on skyflakes booth, heat and ready to eat kare-kare and laing booth, california globe and seedless grapes girl, i even think they were letting people drink samples of lactum vanilla and chocolate.. or whatever milk that was.. hmm.. i think there was also a chicken nuggets booth somewhere..
so after all that food, i brought the shopping bags back to the car and i guess i headed to China Pearl.. which was kinda like one of those hidden places in an rpg where you say "meron palang daan dito..?".. still with mom..
on the way.. i saw mami's mommy.. but still hid in the crowd since i hadn't fixed myself up yet..
mom suggested we go to the restroom.. but when we got there, we were better off fixing ourselves at some furniture shop with mirror displays.. which was quite what i did anyway..
i went someplace in the basement near a stairway under an escalator near some massaging blind guys.. eheheh.. then i headed to China Pearl alone since we were near an exit to the parking lot and mom went back to the car and left me..
so the first thing i noticed to locate the group, while peering into the tinted widow of the restaurant was mami's hair.. the trademark hair she's quite annoyed with when noticed.. ehehe..
well.. i seated myself with the group casually waiting for the arrival of my so called "dadi to be" laughing with mushroom- mami's sister.. (my tita?!?) and batchoi.. about impressions and reactions we would have supposing he arrived already.. ehehe..
so there he was.. (isn't this sounding already like some weird story? maybe i could use this piece as my narrative project in english.. yes, we finally have an assignment in my favorite communist's class ^_^)
seemingly like the proper gentleman suddenly going straightforward in terms when recalling his first ever "molested by a gay when i was grade three" experience.. ehehe.. the perfect "under" for the emotion atomic bomb..
hmm.. maybe i'll continue this later.. i haven't eaten breakfast yet..
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/19/2003 08:13:00 AM
8.16.2003
its another prolonged oppurtunity to post and yet another activity filled day that doesn't reach my archive.. eheheheh.. its ok Ü
its mami's birthday luncheon, as so she calls it, today..
i wish sweetie were able to come let alone be invited sana.. the thought counts you know..
pero even if he was invited, it would be quite a dilemma for him to come since its his double midterms today in Computer.. by this time, i bet he's almost through the first test...
its inevitable that he'll pass, though it seems he doesn't have confidence, since its innate for a former samurai to get around..
well, i'm supposed to be figuring out what to wear to mami's party now, trying to think if i should go in my regular freaky get-ups or tone down for the occasion.. nah! freaky wins..
miss ko na si sweetie.. wah..
its been ages since i got to see him.. i mean its just that i haven't been over for two wednesdays already and thats way different from seeing him last sunday.. i mean i miss being with him with no one to criticize and give malice to whatever we do... everyone here's a sick-o..
maybe its just that everyone's paranoid that i might just end up like my now married brother.. ha! aside from the fact that majority of filipinos are publicly conservative.. yeah.. we have to specify that its usually in public that they're conservative since individually, we must give credit to how creative and imaginative peoples minds are, its just that they're surpressed by inevitable public criticism supposing they express themselves.. everyone seems to have a malicious meaning or equivalent meaning to a simple gesture.. eheheh.. oh well.. i'm babbling again.. got to dress up.. Ü
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/16/2003 08:39:00 AM
8.13.2003
wah! its amazing that i got to get on the computer.. sweetie suggested so since we only had a few minutes to ourselves on the phone.. his dad called him to fix something again on one of the computers at his shop.. and him feeling guilty of doing bad on a test - which he eventually told his dad- couldn't do anything but succumb...
he told me to say everything i wanted to say if we had more time today...
hmm..
lets start with..
miss na kita honey...
i admit nga i felt a bit jealous when molly told me about her blooming love life.. well, you rebutted my feelings with what you said kanina..
your love life has more flowers..
simple.. and it did just the trick to eliminate my petty envy..
well its just that i know i should be happy for her, which i really am (at least she's quite on the norm na )
but she just had to make me see the convenience that her boyfriend is her classmate and blockmate.. they see each other every week for the whole school week.. they get to talk in person.. i mean, he's just there.. its the simple fact that makes my defense tumble down..
sa bagay.. absence makes the heart grow fonder.. and i know you could tell that your sniffles were contagious since i caught them myself in the span of.. hmm.. what.. 20 minutes? less pa nga e..
in other words.. the feelings mutual..
its so frustrating that we can't be together like other couples..
not knowing in real time if you're o.k.
or not being able to help you with problems, no matter how petty thay can be right then and there..
not being there to hug you and take care of you when you feel sick...
not being there to give you everything you need that i can give..
not being there to share my immediate moments of discovery of the little things...
not being there to stare into you eyes, squeeze your hand that would've been intertwined with mine and say that everythings going to be o.k. when you're having a bad day..
naiiyak na ako...
i miss you so much..
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/13/2003 08:21:00 PM
8.01.2003
wawa baby ko ^_^'.. sweetie caught my fever.. told him not to get so close kase eh.. pero he said he couldn't resist hugging me.. sweet and it kinda puts you in a dilemma.. but usually its your mushy wanna-be-cuddled side in the situation that triumphs.. at least he knows what i did to feel way much better.. besides lots of hugs from a loved one (in my situation, i didn't mean to contaminate him with my fever germs..on his part, he was hugging me for comfort Ü).. there's the nice alcohol sponge bath.. eheheheh.. with the electric fan facing you.. not on high though since that might just worsen your cold.. supposing you also had a cold with the fever like i did.. and a lot of sleep.. wow.. glorious sleep.. eheheh..
its kinda late.. but finally i'm determined to start taking my studying seriously.. ok, ok.. just attempt to take my studies seriously.. how can i? with the ever tempting Harry Potter Order of the Pheonix just within my 1 meter radius of my private space whenever i'm in my room... hahaha.. my resistance to the distraction fails when ever i get hold of it to try and put it away.. ehehe.. oh well.. its pretty slow progress for me anyway, since i've only read up to chapter 18.. noting that i already had the e-book a month previous the launch date.. ehehe.. meaning longer than i got hold of my hardcopy *sweatdrop*.. well.. give me credit for some sort of unconcious control over the temptation to read it in one sitting neglecting any sleep.. sleep overwhelms the desire to stay-up anyway.. not even mind over matter.. or the thought of it gets past the unescapable clutches of drowsiness.. unless of course you live on coffee.. which is definitely not me.. caffeine stains your teeth and it can bring quite a bill with your dentist.. eheheh.. (<--what the craps all this gibberish? eheh.. wheres HP5 in the line now?)
oh well..
the attempt to get a make-up quiz failed.. since my silly math prof doesn't give make-up quizzes for any occasion.. yeah.. so he just said casually "so malamang 0 ka na sa quiz na yun".. weird how it didn't seem mean.. then he said "di bale, makakabawi ka naman..".. yeah right my butt.. ehehe.. oh well.. maybe if i really did take my math seriously.. its like one of my voices in my head... hey! i'm not insane or anything.. lets rephrase that.. hmm.. personalities.. yeah.. lets say i have multiple personalities.. (voice one says: yeah right.. freaking weirdo..).. says that i did way better in highschool and then, i thought i was so dumb.. so what does it make me now? okay.. then why am i not moving? hmm.. i don't know.. maybe i'll just go to sleep or something.. ehehehehe...
///
kitten
Bitched, Ranted and Rambled on 8/01/2003 08:03:00 PM
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